The Old Demon “Change”

 We see our reflection in a mirror or in the water or a shiny plate of metal, and we think, “What happened? What happened to that strong, youthful, in control, fine human being? Where did the hair and teeth go? Where did that stomach bulge come from? My joints didn’t use to ache. What happened?”

We know what happened. Change happened. No matter how much we want it not to happen, it happens. It happens in our personal lives. It happens in the social circles in which we move. It happens throughout the world and universe. We cannot stop it. Change happens.

How do we survive it in a healthy manner?

How can we embrace change as a friend instead of as the enemy?

Matthew 13:52 So (Jesus) replied, "This means, then, that every teacher of the Law who becomes a disciple in the Kingdom of heaven is like a homeowner who takes new and old things out of his storage room."

As we look back through the years, we embraced many changes with pride and excitement. The changes came when we moved through a milestone in school. The changes came in our clothing and shoes as we grew toward adulthood. Changes came as we acquired new skills and took on additional responsibilities. Changes came as relationships changed, sometimes for the better and sometimes not so.

In so many instances we saw change as being positive and a mark of our advancement whether in age, in height, or in skills. Somewhere along the way, however, change was no longer seen as a friend. Change became dominated by what we saw as the negative instead of the positive. Change was something to be avoided rather than sought. Instead of growth and accomplishment, change was taking us closer to the end, to death.

In the words of Jesus found in Matthew 13 we find hope. We also find wisdom and strength as we face this inevitable thing in our lives called change. Jesus tells us that change will happen but it doesn’t have to leave us feeling out of control. We can choose how we face this beast, and in choosing we can control how we will face it.

Every change we face offers us one great area still under our control: our attitude. We can decide what our attitudes will be with each change, and that will give us the control over how we face what is happening. Our attitudes dictate our perspective on the situation. They allow us to evaluate our options. They prepare us for the consequences of each choice we make. Change may happen beyond our ability to stop it, but we can shape the results of the change in many ways.

We can look at what we may be losing and what we may be gaining with each change. Our perspectives allow us to see what we are gaining may far exceed in long term value what we are giving up. Any time we can see we have profited from a change, it is much easier to handle. We may decide what we are losing was of value only because it was familiar and not because it was contributing to the quality of our lives. The newness coming into our lives may be somewhat fearful because it is different, but what it offers is so much more than what we had.

The wise individual in the thought of Jesus is one who willingly looks at all he has and decides how to move forward with it. He draws some from the old because it has proven itself to be of value in the future he now faces. He grasps the new because only with the new will he be able to deal with the change that has occurred. As we move through the years, it is a decision we face often.

I Told You So!

Don’t you just hate it when you hear those words directed at you? It is bad enough to be wrong. It is worse when you are wrong and someone else is right. The worst situation is when you are wrong, someone else is right, and they remind you of it. At that moment you pray for patience and the strength to admit you are wrong and they are right without you doing something crude and brutal to them or wishing someone else would.

Being civilized should mean something in our conversation with others. We think before we speak or act. We consider how our words might be received by our listeners. We do all we can to make sure what we want to say is what is understood by our listeners. We know our tone of voice will convey as much if not more than our words. Even our body language will determine how our words are received.

The brief statement, “I told you so”, conveys different meanings and emotions to different people. The confession I offer here is simply I do not like the statement, and it has a tremendous impact upon how I look at the person making the statement both at the time and in later situations.

Is this a new statement? Not at all. I have very little disagreement with the Apostle Paul. He could, however, test my patience on the rare occasion. This involves how he treated some people and how his speech did not always convey the compassion and grace the gospel demanded.

On example may be found in Acts 15 where Paul refused to allow John Mark to travel with him on his second missionary journey due to a past failing. Emotions prevailed and a missionary partnership was dissolved. Only later was there a reconciliation. The other example of Paul’s abruptness is found in Acts 27 during the long and disastrous journey from Caesarea to Rome for Paul’s trial before the emperor.

Act 27:20-21 For many days we could not see the sun or the stars, and the wind kept on blowing very hard. We finally gave up all hope of being saved. After everyone had gone a long time without food, Paul stood before them and said, "You should have listened to me and not have sailed from Crete; then we would have avoided all this damage and loss.

Earlier in the voyage the captain and the crew had decided to make the voyage to Rome instead of staying in a less than adequate harbor for the winter. Paul had counseled staying in the safety of the harbor limited as it might be. Now with disaster seeming to await them, Paul stands up and says, “I told you so!” I would have thrown him overboard.

Reading the chapter you will discover the ship is lost, but everyone escapes to an island safely and are rescued, eventually able to continue their journey to Rome. Paul’s words, however, hang as a sour note in the middle of God’s rescue of the crew and passengers. Who wants to hear someone say, “I told you so” even while your ship faces almost certain destruction?

Being right is a wonderful feeling. Being right when everyone else seems to be wrong can lead you to feel more than a little self-righteous. James in his brief letter carrying his name emphasized we need to:

Jam 1:19 Remember this, my dear friends! Everyone must be quick to listen, but slow to speak and slow to become angry.

Being quick to listen and slow to speak is what gives us the opportunity to think about what would be most appropriate to say before we say it. Being right is always best. Being right and silent may also be appropriate, at times even better.

Give warning when warning is needed. Allow the results to show you were right. If they are evident, then all will know and need not be told. If the results are not evident, don’t be so sure you were right.

Those Attitudes!

When Jesus spoke to his disciples in what we now have recorded as the Sermon on the Mount, he addressed the role of material objects. Most important was our attitude toward those material objects. In one brief but critical passage, he said:

Mat 6:19  "Do not store up riches for yourselves here on earth, where moths and rust destroy, and robbers break in and steal.

Mat 6:20  Instead, store up riches for yourselves in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and robbers cannot break in and steal.

Mat 6:21  For your heart will always be where your riches are.

We brought nothing into the world. We will take nothing with us – except our attitude toward God in Christ. Our attitude toward the world around us will determine the priority of Christ in our lives. It all boils down to how we define the riches in our lives.

If objects and material goods represent the riches in our lives, then we will develop the attitude these material objects have the priority in our decisions. It will affect how hard we work to make money and how we will spend that money. Our attitudes will dictate what role these material objects will play in our lives and how they will affect other aspects of our lives.

When relationships dominate our priorities, here as well our attitudes will shape our responses. What are we willing to sacrifice? What will we demand? How much will we reach out and to what extent we will retreat into a shell of our own making? All of this is dictated by our attitudes.

The Apostle Paul told the church at Philippi they had one standard by which to evaluate and judge their attitudes toward life in general and people in particular. That standard was the example of Jesus Christ both in his coming into our world and how he was willing to leave.

Php 2:5  The attitude you should have is the one that Christ Jesus had:

Php 2:6  He always had the nature of God, but he did not think that by force he should try to remain equal with God.

Php 2:7  Instead of this, of his own free will he gave up all he had, and took the nature of a servant. He became like a human being and appeared in human likeness.

Php 2:8  He was humble and walked the path of obedience all the way to death--- his death on the cross.

Life on this planet is transient. We are not promised tomorrow in our mortal existence, much less the expectation to live on forever in the flesh. This knowledge of our limited number of years should have a transformational effect on our priorities and our attitudes.

What is important to us will determine how we live today and the legacy we will leave for those who follow us. We will be remembered for how our attitudes shaped our decisions and the outcomes of those decisions. Do we care how we are remembered after we are dead? That itself is a decision-shaping attitude.

Two funerals for close family members in the last six months have heightened for me the importance of our attitudes and their impact on our lives. This includes not only how we remember those who have died, but also our own response to their deaths. How we viewed these individuals while they lived and the relationships we had with them greatly influences our present attitude towards them and our own futures.

These attitudes also impact the relationships we have with the people who remain with us. How will we allow time and circumstances to affect those relationships? Our attitudes will affect dynamics, decisions, and intensity of these relationships. How we allow our attitudes to develop is critical to the health of any relationship.

For Jesus the servant attitude was all important. That was the only option. When we adopt the example of Christ and assume the servant attitude he lived out, then we will find ourselves in the position of pleasing God and living lives of greater peace and fulfillment. That is the goal of most people and should be the goal of all.

Happiness Is In the Result

At one time or another most of us have heard a variation of the philosophical insight, “Life is 10% what happens and 90% of how you respond to it.” Out of that comes the knowledge the only real part of our lives over which we have total control is our attitudes. Nobody makes us happy. We decide to see something as a source of happiness. No one can make us angry. We decide the action of someone else has crossed one of our boundaries and we choose to let the anger flow.

A recent meeting among our churches focused upon the Beatitudes found in Matthew 5:1-10. Various speakers shared information on ministries that in some manner represented one of the statements from this passage. The program provided more than facts on logistics. Human needs with faces took on a reality often missed in statistical reports.

Frank Stagg, a 20^th century Baptist New Testament scholar, pointed out the Greek of the Beatitudes may be translated as “Oh, the happiness of” rather than “blessed”. (The Broadman Bible Commentary) Since no verb exists in the Greek, using a simple introductory phrase adequately translates the phrase. His use of the word “happiness” emphasizes the impact of each beatitude as much if not more than the qualities mentioned for each.

Happiness is found in the results of the qualities put into practice, not the qualities themselves. Blessings come from those qualities being lived out and incorporated into daily lives. They are not ends unto themselves. Happiness is not gained through being, but through doing and our attitude in the process.

As each church representative shared how their family of faith was touching the lives of people around them, the joy was obvious. An example was one church that had grown a food pantry ministry into a major food distribution center working with several hundred families and supported by local food banks and grocery stores. The goal had not been to collect food. That was a method. The goal was to feed people for whom the month extended longer that personal resources would last. The happiness came with meeting the need.

Other information shared during the service focused upon the plight of aids victims in Africa where treatment and compassion can both be in short supply. No one wants to be infected with HIV or see a family member agonize under its destructive power. Yet happiness can be found by those who are poor in spirit and will humble themselves through helping the outcasts of society. A display pointed to the persecution of Christians in more than forty countries around the world. Happiness can be found by those who will seek to support those who remain faithful in their beliefs in spite of the threats of discrimination, imprisonment, and death.

“Oh, the happiness of” those who are poor in spirit, who mourn, who are meek, who hunger and thirst for righteousness, who are merciful, who are pure in heart, who are peacemakers, and who are persecuted for righteousness’s sake. Their happiness does not come because of the needs they experience or see. The happiness comes through the way they respond.

The Beatitudes call us to respond to the needs of the world and find there the happiness that is absent from what the world offers. Happiness comes through giving, giving to others in their need and giving to God in faithful obedience.

Happiness is often seen as a passing emotion, generated by the context of the moment. It need not be. It can become the deep response of joy that is untouched by external circumstances. That occurs when we decide “It is more blessed to give that to receive”. (Acts 20:35) The happiness is greater when we place others first. It is an attitude we choose.