Several
years ago I spent ten days in Ukraine on a mission trip. Driving through its
beautiful rural countryside and then serving in a small community, I decided
there were few places on earth that could claim your heart so fast. The beauty
of the land was reflected in the hearts of the people.
For the last
fifteen hundred years or so, Ukraine has known little freedom. Its people have
been under the thumb of empires to the east and the west throughout the
centuries as the foreigners traded power grabs. The Ukrainian people always
seemed to be the losers. With few natural barriers in their country, the open
land served as an unobstructed highway for one invading army after another. Now
they are facing it again after less than 25 years of self-rule.
The list of
“hot spots” in our world today would more than fill this page. Nation against
nation gets the big headlines. Tribe against tribe comes in a close second.
Then of course there is faith against faith, the haves against the have-nots,
the powerful against the weak, and ultimately those who just disagree. No
matter where you look, it seems there is somebody who is more than willing to
fight to settle the issue. Why can’t we just get along?
I detest
that naïve, polly-anna question. As long as one person has an opinion of what
is right and what is wrong and another person has a different right-wrong
perspective, we will have discussions that degenerate into disagreements and
ultimately into fights. Call it what you will, but sin defined as a
self-righteous stranglehold on truth can usually be seen as the culprit.
This problem
exists on the international scene. It also exists at the very personal level of
one person relating to another. In that setting the disagreement gets settled
in the classic, “I’m right and I’ll bust your nose to prove it!” As we all know
this proves nothing when it comes to what is true. It merely reflects the fact
that words have failed and the muscle in the arm has trumped the muscle between
the ears.
The Apostle
Paul says we should make the effort to live at peace with those around us.
(Romans 12:18) He recognizes that making peace has to be a two-sided affair.
Unilateral peace only goes so far. He continues, however, with the idea revenge
cannot be the answer. That belongs to God alone. Our response must take a
different form. (Romans 12:19-21)
Jesus gave
us a better way to handle our conflicts. In Matthew 18 he outlined a series of
steps that were meant to lead to open communication, mutual understanding, and
finally reconciliation. We are sinful human beings with limited perspectives
and egos always eager to assume the exalted position. These must be
acknowledged and overcome so that the goal of reconciliation can have a chance
of being reached.
These are
some guiding thoughts for striving for peace between individuals and within
groups.
·
Listen to
reach full understanding of the other perspective
·
Find common
ground for agreement
·
Identify
areas outside the critical core of non-negotiable absolutes
·
Determine
areas allowing for mutually acceptable compromise
·
Seek to
disagree in agreeable fashion
·
Give others
the benefit of the doubt
·
Give others
a second chance when mistakes are made and admitted
·
Be ready to
forgive
Even with
all this there are still the black and white issues of right and wrong. These
are grounded in the foundation of our absolutes. Jesus had them. He expects his
followers to have them. He did not hesitate to take a whip into the Temple and
clean house. (Matthew 21:12-13) At the same time he could disagree with ritual
demands and still feel he needed to go along with them because the issue wasn’t
worth the fight. (Matthew 17:24-27)
Jesus got
his non-negotiable absolutes from the nature of his Father as should all his
followers. This doesn’t make settling conflicts necessarily any easier on the
personal or the international level. It is, however, where we are called to
start and end.
