Recently I
head the Children’s Minister for one of my churches speak in a Sunday morning service
recognizing the importance of the little people in the family of faith. She
made a comment that caused me to grimace just a little bit, but I knew what she
meant. She said, “I am not a gardener. When I plant seeds, I don’t know if they
will grow.”
Of course
she was talking about getting her hands dirty out in the yard trying to get
flowers to grow. However, I wanted to stand up and say, “Give yourself some
credit, girl. You are working in the most important garden God has made, the
lives of little children.” The rest of her message said as much, emphasizing
the importance of the nurturing we give the next generation.
We who are
adults now are important. We are the current leaders. We are the current
decision makers. We are the determiners of the context in which the next
generation will have to make its decisions. We need to remember the day will
come when that generation will be making those decisions, and some of those
decisions will affect our final years. Be nice to your children. They will choose
your nursing home. (That is not original from me!)
An article
from the University of Missouri-Columbia (Child
Development – How Preschoolers Develop) shares this information. At birth
an infant is nearly one third of its height when it finishes growing. By the
time a child is two, its physical height is almost half its adult height. One
of the critical personality traits learned during these first years while
physical growth is occurring is trust. It is the foundation for future
relationships and the positive experiences those relationships can provide.
Linda Carrol,
writing for MSNBC (Personality May Be Set
By Preschool), cites a series of studies that indicate a significant part
of a child’s personality is set by age three. This does not preclude, however,
additional changes by events and decisions later in life. She quotes one
researcher as saying within an individual’s personality, “tremendous change
occurs even up until the 50s.” Foundations are laid in the preschool years. The
walls of the personality structure can still be shaped through nearly a life
span.
The book of
Proverbs speaks of the value of the children in our midst and the importance of
proper nurture. We must be intentional in shaping the pliable side of the
personality. Training given at an early age will last for a lifetime (22:6).
Appropriate discipline will provide guidance for future decisions (23:13-18;
29:17).
This
children’s minster was working with a most precious crop. She was planting seed
that would sprout in the years ahead and bear much fruit. But like the grains
and grasses in the fields of a farm, these sprouts would continue to need
nurture and care. Much would be accomplished in those first three to four
years, but the molding would not be finished for decades to come.
Within the
home family, biological or adopted, and within the family of faith, our
children deserve our best. They deserve our selfless love. They deserve our
wisdom gained through our years of experience. They deserve our grace even as
we have received grace from our heavenly Father. They deserve the opportunity
grow and become independent within the arms of a loving family that will teach
them dependence upon a Father who will always be with them and love them beyond
all human understanding.
Jesus said
to let the children come to him for to such belongs the Kingdom of heaven. (Mark
10:13-16) In the innocence of a childlike faith, God asks his children to come
to him. He seeks their love even as he seeks to give them his love. They
approach the heavenly Father with the same trust they should learn to have in
their earthly fathers. It is critical that we give the children of our families
and churches the opportunity to learn to trust the God who gave them life.
